Wednesday, May 14, 2008

All Quiet on the Western Front

Pixiedust, you can live now until Friday or Saturday or maybe even Monday. There isn't any possible way to finish this SSS (second stupid sock) unless I get incredibly motivated. I thought yesterday would be that day but I had my youngest home sick with the same virus that dropped me to my knees last month. I only got to the first round of gusset decreases when my hands just wouldn't make another stitch.

I have developed some injuries and I'm almost certain I won't get a purple heart for them. I pray almost wish the mail would bring the socks that kill me today (I will reimburse my assassin if she overnights the socks that kill me.) Ibuprofen doesn't begin to touch my hand, wrist forearm and elbow pain. These are repetitive motion injuries and there is no help for them except rest. Dilaudid might help. Yes, I'm almost certain it would. Lots of it.

I have a class tomorrow that I have to take. It's a work requirement to be ACLS (Advanced Cardiac Life Support) certified. I recert tomorrow. I haven't studied or taken the pretest. I haven't even popped the DVD in. Today, I MUST do some of that. I have no earthly idea how I'll intubate the dummy with my hands feeling the way they do. If I wear wrist braces, do you think the ACLS instructors will give me a pass on the physical mechanics of ACLS? At least it isn't my first ACLS class. That one gave me hives. It's just a recert Rudee; calm down. Do you think I can mix xanax with the dilaudid?

I have to shower and at least shave my legs today, it's getting gamey around here. Let's not talk about the vacuum, laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, chasing the Damn Dog, etc. It's rather obvious to all who enter that I'm a bit obsessed with this sock thing and there has been "talk" amongst the dwellers; it seems they think I've lost it. I think I need a maid. At least that way, they wouldn't talk. All would have a clean house (which they don't care about) and fresh groceries falling off the shelves (which they do care about.)

I have to take my CrackBook in for it's casing change. I'm trying to figure how best I can live without it. Perhaps, I'll drop it Friday since I work the weekend. The Genius couldn't tell me how long I'd be without my newest appendage. It's amazing how charming I find the cracks and tape job now that I can't have it with me for a day or two. The flaws make my Mac unique which would come in handy if it got stolen and I had to identify it later. Maybe I can live with flaws.

So you see Pixiedust, you have time. My life and my job have totally gotten in the way of you meeting your maker. Go ahead, take a breather. Kill your victim and get the socks she is working on. All is well......

Update:  It is 11:30 AM and the mailman just dropped off bills and the weekly community newspaper.  I could just weep... Please send me a man in brown!

To Update my update:  It's now 6:30 PM and no man in brown.  No Fed-Ex and no DHL for that matter either.  Can't hardly take it!

To Update my update's update:  It's now 7PM and here is what my assassin sent me as a response to my email begging her to kill me:  "You are too funny.  I think I'll let you guess where I'm at LOL."  Just for that, I think perhaps a row a day is in order!


Rositta said...

That's funny, or not...I have sore thumbs too and I have a wrist brace today. I'm waiting to get knocked off too, watching for the mail truck. I went outside yesterday for the first time in three days and was shocked at how good it felt. Hang in there friend, Pixidust will die...ciao

Rudee said...

I'm trying. I am.....

Preita said...

I feel your pain! except I have a twinge right above my elbow. I know it's not from knitting these socks, but all my crazy obsessive fast knitting in general.

Also, is your dog a Black & Tan Coon Hound? O_O I want one sooo bad, alas california doesn't really provide enough room for a dog like that, so we are an english bulldog family.

Rudee said...

Preita, I'd be happy to overnight Damn Dog to you. She has a head full of rocks for a brain and is a RUNNER. As in runaway every chance she gets. Her placement here is a mistake. She needs to be where she can hunt. That's what she does. Nothing gets in the way of her and her nose. Yep, she is a B & T Coonhound straight from the devil. Her name is Ellie Mae aka Damn Dog, aka Jezebel.

I'm sad she isn't working out for us. Her running is a dangerous behavior that even a shock collar won't stop. She is impervious to it and pretty much everything else. I live 1 block from a very busy road with speeds 45mph. She has twice nearly caused accidents out there. The other dog pictured is my Dobie. He's a good boy.

The Rotten Correspondent said...

ACLS. Ugh.

Mega Codes. Ugh.

No wonder you want someone to kill you.

Rudee said...

Passed RC. This is the most relaxed I've been about ACLS since I first took it in 1992. They were not friendly courses to pass back then and you did it all individually-not as a team like codes are in the real world!