I Knit Here Too

Well, now that it isn't all hockey all the time here anymore, this is what I've been up to. This beautiful pair of socks is Terra Incognito by Pink Lemon Twist from her Earth Elements Collection. This may be the best value for six dollars I've spent in a long time. I'm sure to get more mileage from these patterns than six dollars worth of gas would get me. Her patterns are so detailed and written in both word and graph format. I learned to use knitting charts a year ago and as far as I'm concerned, there is no going back to the line by line instructions I'd learned to knit by-especially when it comes to lace. I did cut the leg shorter by one pattern repeat on this particular sock.

Terra Incognito in Dream In Colors Smooshy-Chinatown Apple Colorway

Once again, procrastination has bit me in the arse. This is "The Anniversary" gift I've been knitting for MONTHS. It isn't hard, but it is warm. Today, I need to work on this project that doesn't seem to end and it's a balmy 90 degrees or so out there. I am struggling just trying to find a way to knit it where the bulk of the project isn't in my lap. Air conditioning doesn't help when you are covered in Blue Faced Leicester, merino boucle, mohair loop and the secret yarn. It's hot no matter how you do it.

The Anniversary Gift for Dohamommeister and her better half.

I am still taking time here and there to appreciate the beauty of my garden. These irises are my favorite plant to look forward to and this week, they finally bloomed. This will be the plant I split when the blooming is finished. It started from one little plant about 15 years ago. On it's own, it has spread nearby. I want to plant it down the side of my house this year.

Yep, it's trash day. Don't look at the trash. I could learn a few things about photo composition. On the day I took this picture, I only had eyes for the flowers.

These are the death socks that finally killed me during sock wars. They are a tad big but I can use them as house socks. They were started by one knitter and completed by another. Each had their own interpretation of the pattern. So did I. The orderly knitting engineer within me has been smitten by the charm of this sock wars theme: my socks touched the hands of two knitters and came to reside in a third knitter's hands. I don't think it gets better than that in the charming department. The first pair I knit was more like the sock you see on the left with a rather lacy like increase. The second pair I started was more like the one on the right.

In this picture, you can see the sock on the left is the one I knit to try to kill SoCalLadyR. I sent detailed instructions to my assassin in the hope she could recreate my sock-or at least come close. I think my death socks were in Tofutsies which we've discussed has no memory. Even though the sock on the left in the picture below has soy in the blend, it's primarily wool and holds more memory. It was a pleasure to work with that yarn. Tofutsies? Not so much.

I have worn my death socks to work and they are comfortable. Thank you to both my assassins. It's somehow gratifying to know it took two of you to kill me.

"Shoot Straight You B*st*rds! Don't Make a Mess of It!

And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

Rudee the Warrior aka Madame Defarge was assocksecuted today by a sister in arms: a fellow knitter. Death came swiftly by parcel post. Her family, ashamed by recent war crimes that have come to light had no comments other than to say, "Thank God! Perhaps now, there will be a hot meal on the table once in a while."

Temptation and War Crimes

I wish I were saying I was kicking the bucket, but I'm not. I cast on sock # 4 for sock wars late last night. I can't really say why this pair isn't done yet. I'm not really ignoring them-they just seem to go on forever for such a short little pair of socks. One would think I was knitting intricate kilt hose for a man with a size 15 shoe. They're just short little socks for a target who wears a size 7 shoe.

Part of the problem is a deficit in the attention department. I seem to find one thing and then another that drags me away from what I need to be doing. These things aren't necessarily important to me. They're just little temptations that lead me astray or off task. Last night, I played with a feature on my Macbook that I had no idea was even residing in my applications. I'd gone looking for my Flickr Uploadr so I could add images to use as my Ravatar and found photo booth too. It takes a picture with my built in camera and can change the effects of the photo as it snaps it. I thought thermal was a great choice given the recent reappearance of my hot flashes. But it does xray too. And sepia, comic book, pencil sketch, pop art and of course, normal. It was way cooler than knitting Ruth's sock (sorry Ruth, but it was.)


The other thing that led me astray was watching Ghost for the millionth time. I can do without the gooey parts of that movie. Truth be told, I watch it for the scenes with Whoopi. By this time, it was 11:30 PM when the movie started and I was whipping through that sock. I was on the cuff that was K1P1 for 12 rows and just going around and around my needles in a mindless way. Thinking I was at the part where I'd start the pattern, I looked down and saw that I had left out those pesky purl stitches for the past three rows and I had only 9 rows of ribbing with 3 rows of stockinette stitch. Dammit. So I frogged ever so delicately back to row 8 and tried to finish the rib. It's Whoopi's fault.

Lastly, I am knitting these for a woman who has petite feet. I was thrown by how small the first completed sock appears. I've never knit for someone with such a dainty foot. I'm used to knitting for people including myself, who have pretty large feet for girls. There I am, looking at sock one and wondering if my trusty little sheep tape measure is lying. It isn't but I'm worried. Therefore Ruth, if you are reading this, I've made the toe easy to unravel in case you need to make an adjustment. I also made an executive decision to give you a more feminine toe on this sock. I hope you know a good lawyer I could use in case I get arrested for making a change to the pattern. I took the toe down to 14 stitches on each needle and then did a stunningly executed Kitchener stitch.

Sock Wars Apathy

Here are your socks Ruth (no, not moi.) Is this yarn not fabulous? I want some.

I am still alive and I can't believe this unfortunate turn of events. I'd fully expected to be having a couple of cold ones agonizing over my eulogy by now! Instead, I'm faced with another complete pair of socks to make while at the same time, I've been struck with a vicious case of sock knitting apathy (at least for this pattern.) I am almost to the heel of the first sock and plan to get through that tonight. Then I'll try to work on the foot. Perhaps it's because I had to start over once I received them as the gauge was completely off. I'd been hoping for a bit of a head start at the very least. I'd think by this point in my life, I'd get used to disappointment.
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Which sock got gauge? No fair guessing the one on the needles.

Holy Moley. That's a huge difference. I think the one on the left is a smidge gimongous!

So, I cast on the day I got them on US size stinkin' one needles. The yarn is a bit dark. My eyes have passed the half century mark. You get the picture. It's HARD TO SEE THE FREAKING STITCHES. This is OK until I get to the increase 1 in the pattern which occurs rather frequently. The stitches seem small but I have gauge. I'll plod along and see where I get but if I'm not dead tomorrow, I completely expect I'll get my second kill. I hope so. Monday is a holiday here and there won't be any mail delivery. Boo-hoo Woo-hoo. I live to kill yet again.

In case you wanted to know what I'm doing instead of knitting:

I Got You My Pretty....

It seems I'm waiting now in a sort of limbo on more fronts than one.  There is no news in respect to last night's post but I'll know soon enough.  I'm rather philosophical about the whole thing.  If it's meant to be, it'll happen.  I worry too about that old adage about being careful what you wish for, it tends to bite one in the ass more often than not.  Still, I'm ready and I think my interview went incredibly well.  We'll see.  

On another front, I've cast on a new pair of socks.  For me.  I'm waiting for Pixiedust to send me the socks she is making for her own target who is now my new target while I wait for my assassin to put me out of this battle.  Damn.  Hurry up Patty.  I can't start from scratch on my new target and must use the ones Pixie has made or I hope she's at least started.  A new Pixie was posted on the dead warrior site and I think it's her.  I can't tell though since she didn't make any other items public like her town, or surname.  Nothing.  Nada.  Zilch.  I am so not feeling satisfied here. Even a message like damn, these socks suck would have been better than nothing.  OK, I take that back.  No it wouldn't-but a little something would put my mind at ease.  I keep forgetting myself though.  She's dead. 

To alleviate my boredom and further my skill at procrastination (I still have to finish my sister's gift and that pink sweater), I went fishing in the yarn hoard supply and caught an already wound up ball of Dream in Color's Smooshy in Chinatown Apple.  I've cast on and knit the cuff and part of the first sequence in the gorgeous Terra Incognito pattern by Pink Lemon Twist.  So far, it's fun, complicated, lacy and twisted, but at least the pattern appears error free and makes complete sense.  The yarn is a pleasure to work with and for sure, I'll buy more.

This pair I cast on solely on the 2 circular needles and plan to do them start to finish in this way.  The needles I used for Sock Wars were both dpns and circs.  This time, only circs.  Next time, 2 socks at a time on one circ, I just need longer cables for the circs.  If you think this hobby of mine is inexpensive, think again.  A pair of Addi Turbos will set you back a pretty penny-as will hoarding yarn.  Shhh.  Don't tell my husband.  Or my kids.

When my Mom passed away, all of us kids were shocked at the amount of lottery tickets we found in the house.  Hundreds and hundreds.  I don't want my children to be annoyed with me when I'm gone, or think I had yarn "issues."  Well actually, it may be too late for that.  At least this is better than losing lotto tickets.  It could all be sold on ebay and would probably fetch a fair price.  I don't buy the cheap stuff.  Evah.

I was hunting on You Tube for an appropriate death knell for Pixie and watched a lot of clips from the Wizard of Oz.  If you think I'm wandering here, I'm not.  Besides, read my header; it plainly states I ramble on this site.  Don't say ya weren't warned.  Anyways, I watched the clip where the Wicked Witch gets it in the face with the bucket of water.  I love that scene.  And I love her last coherent words too.  So here's to your demise Pixie.  Now send those socks!

Diary of a Mad Sock Knitter

I'm modeling the Detonator socks for you as I'm not sure if Pixiedust has a way of sharing them with the world and they are too fabulous not to share!

Truth be told, I've not been knitting socks for very long. I started a little over a year ago and taught myself with online videos from Knitting Help and several books. Most of the books made absolutely no sense until I read the Yarn Harlot's book, Knitting Rules! Her description of how to make socks suddenly clicked and I've not put down itty bitty sock yarn and toothpick sized needles since. I've knit about a dozen pair in a little over a year. One week is the fastest I've ever knocked a pair out with the exception of a pair made in a thicker yarn. Those were super fast. I'm learning new tricks all the time and challenging myself. This particular pair was made mostly on 2 circular needles. I like it. It's fast-faster than double points and nary a ladder to be seen which is an issue when using 4 or 5 needles. This will probably become my favored method.

These are the socks drying. Yes, I washed them after modeling.

Sock knitting is mysterious, fun and portable. I take a sock in progress just about everywhere and time flies. I feel empty handed and fidgety when I find myself waiting somewhere with time on my hands and nothing to knit in them. As my Granny used to say, "idle hands are the devil's workshop." I'd have been a better kid if she'd taught me to knit.

Proof that socks are portable.

People are enchanted watching other people knit; it's hypnotic and peaceful. There wasn't a single person in my ACLS class who wasn't charmed by my tale of a battle to the death using socks as a weapon. Many pictures were taken during class but I chose to show you the lethal arrhythmia on the monitor during the Megacode. This is one that's ok for the dummy but that nurses don't want to ever see in real life!

My first pair of socks I knit were in an extraordinary ugly yarn in which I managed NOT to get gauge (surprise.) They are huge and hideous but at the same time very special. Kind of like your firstborn is special. I wear them on my feet at night when it's cold out. They're gargantuan and would fit Andre the Giant. These lovely and soft Lorna's Laces are the perfect size for Pixie. The colors are beautiful and despite the fact that I abhor the pattern, it does make this special yarn stand out. I hope my target appreciates the beauty of these socks.

Meet Myra. She was a sport at the post office and posed with my outgoing package. See, even an assassin needs friends in places where they can do you some good. Thanks Myra.

I apologize for the blurriness of this photo. I must have been excited to see them go and maybe a bit reluctant. The time came and off they went today. They'll be at their destination by noon Saturday. Incidentally, I'm still alive. Damn.

Sam Adams, Take Me Away

This is my first night to relax since Sock Wars started. The pressure is off now and if I die tomorrow, at least I got to take someone out with me. I'd hate to die in vain. I'm still concerned that this woman I'm offing doesn't show herself publicly on any of the forums we warriors visit. She's like a ghost or as I read on the Sock Wars forum, a zombie. Yep. But her feet will look great dead in those socks I knit her! I've only to kitchener the last of the stitches and I'll have that done in a brief bit. Unlike many I know, I like a good kitchener stitch toe. It doesn't frighten me and as long as I am not imbibing, I can usually keep it together.

No refs to scream at tonight on the television while I knit-God is that distracting. I lost track more times than I can count just getting caught up in the drama of that game. Give it up Dallas! Pixie has to and now, so do you all. Or as you say down there, "y'all." Tomas did not have his skate in the crease and it's hardly his fault if his fine ass derriere was perceived to be over the line. First, I think there's quite a bit of padding there to protect the crown jewels so perhaps it sticks out more. We discussed this (ok, I discussed this) on my last Sock Hockey post. Secondly, I think this manly piece of hockey wonder probably has a very muscular gluteus most maximus. Bodacious most likely. Not saying. Just guessing. It isn't his fault if his bum crossed the line. Y'all whine like his whole being was in there with the goalie. Wonder what my hunka man Don Cherry thought about this. That's him up there in the sidebar lookin all spiffy and ever so slightly like he forgot to take his mood stabilizers.

I'm done with ACLS too. I ran a megacode and saved the patient with cardiac tamponade. I also got to practice drilling an IO site (in lieu of an IV, we can administer fluids and drugs into bone marrow) into a fake tibia. God, I love my job. I could never do it to a human (ok, I probably could) but it was fun to play with the drill. I got to stick an imaginary needle into the dummy's chest and aspirate all that blood. If he'd been wearing a seat belt, this probably wouln't have happened to him! I hate getting the PEA megacodes. They suck. You've got electricity but, to paraphrase my Canadian colleagues, Dude, you got no pump. Not a good match in terms of making it. Thus the acronym PEA-pulseless electrical activity. You dead. Just like Pixie.

I dropped the CrackBook off and had a lovely chat with the genius about the damage on the top of my Mac. Just fix it. MacLess me until tomorrow. Or Saturday. Or Sunday. Or maybe Monday. Just how many do they have to fix? Alas, I am using the desktop (windows) which is making me somewhat Dellerious. So, you get no pictures today. I'm off to visit with my husband a bit and drink a couple of those ice cold Summer Ales.

Watch Out for The Killers

I gained quite a bit of ground and should finish Pixiedust's Socks. This one's for you Ruth. I'm going to kill her and then I'll take her socks and finish you off too. It's only fitting that it end like this for you. I'm off to bed now to sleep fast for ACLS tomorrow.

Never quite studied for ACLS with my laptop, the AHA ACLS disk playing and me knitting socks. I don't know how I managed to keep the pattern straight (or my version of the cryptic pattern), but I did.

Have a great day. This song (by The Killers) is for Ms. MIA Pixiedust. Bang-bang.

Update:  It is 5:00PM EDT and I am ALIVE!  I am 10 rows from doing a kitchener stitch on these puppies then off to ship first thing in the morning.  Take care there Pixiedust for your demise is close.  Very close.  And even though I know how, I'll not resuscitate you!  I had fun entertaining my ACLS classmates with my mad knitting.  They insisted there be pictures.  There are.  I'll post them later.  I bet I'm the first knitter in Sock Wars with socks pictured in an ACLS Megacode!  There is a first for everything.  Right now, I'm off to eat yummy Italian food.

All Quiet on the Western Front

Pixiedust, you can live now until Friday or Saturday or maybe even Monday. There isn't any possible way to finish this SSS (second stupid sock) unless I get incredibly motivated. I thought yesterday would be that day but I had my youngest home sick with the same virus that dropped me to my knees last month. I only got to the first round of gusset decreases when my hands just wouldn't make another stitch.

I have developed some injuries and I'm almost certain I won't get a purple heart for them. I pray almost wish the mail would bring the socks that kill me today (I will reimburse my assassin if she overnights the socks that kill me.) Ibuprofen doesn't begin to touch my hand, wrist forearm and elbow pain. These are repetitive motion injuries and there is no help for them except rest. Dilaudid might help. Yes, I'm almost certain it would. Lots of it.


I have a class tomorrow that I have to take. It's a work requirement to be ACLS (Advanced Cardiac Life Support) certified. I recert tomorrow. I haven't studied or taken the pretest. I haven't even popped the DVD in. Today, I MUST do some of that. I have no earthly idea how I'll intubate the dummy with my hands feeling the way they do. If I wear wrist braces, do you think the ACLS instructors will give me a pass on the physical mechanics of ACLS? At least it isn't my first ACLS class. That one gave me hives. It's just a recert Rudee; calm down. Do you think I can mix xanax with the dilaudid?

I have to shower and at least shave my legs today, it's getting gamey around here. Let's not talk about the vacuum, laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, chasing the Damn Dog, etc. It's rather obvious to all who enter that I'm a bit obsessed with this sock thing and there has been "talk" amongst the dwellers; it seems they think I've lost it. I think I need a maid. At least that way, they wouldn't talk. All would have a clean house (which they don't care about) and fresh groceries falling off the shelves (which they do care about.)

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I have to take my CrackBook in for it's casing change. I'm trying to figure how best I can live without it. Perhaps, I'll drop it Friday since I work the weekend. The Genius couldn't tell me how long I'd be without my newest appendage. It's amazing how charming I find the cracks and tape job now that I can't have it with me for a day or two. The flaws make my Mac unique which would come in handy if it got stolen and I had to identify it later. Maybe I can live with flaws.

So you see Pixiedust, you have time. My life and my job have totally gotten in the way of you meeting your maker. Go ahead, take a breather. Kill your victim and get the socks she is working on. All is well......

Update:  It is 11:30 AM and the mailman just dropped off bills and the weekly community newspaper.  I could just weep... Please send me a man in brown!

To Update my update:  It's now 6:30 PM and no man in brown.  No Fed-Ex and no DHL for that matter either.  Can't hardly take it!

To Update my update's update:  It's now 7PM and here is what my assassin sent me as a response to my email begging her to kill me:  "You are too funny.  I think I'll let you guess where I'm at LOL."  Just for that, I think perhaps a row a day is in order!

I've Cleared the Decks Pixiedust

Today Pixiedust, is all about you. Today, I'll haul ass in circles looking for a way to put an end to you. I've one sock down and one to go. My assassins assassin has been quiet but I know she is out to get me. The Supreme Commander told me so. I had emailed her to complain about your blackout status:

"I have sent 2 emails to my target with no response and she isn't listed in the warrior database as either dead or alive. Is she flaky? If so, she doesn't deserve these beautiful socks. If she isn't playing, whom should I kill oh Supreme Commander? Her target? Also, my assassin committed sockicide. Is her assassin going to try to kill me? Please advise."

This is what I learned:

"Nope - she's alive, kill her! Your original assassin's assassin is knitting to kill you.... "

Your sock will be done some time today. The second sock. Since I lost Sunday and Monday knitting time in order to pay the bills, I am going to create one more. I will overnight this to you with delivery by noon Thursday. Bang. Bang.

Sock Hockey Drama

Pixiedust's Easter Egg Detonator Sock and Detroit Hockey

v. 3

I tried really hard to use Tofutsies. I couldn't bear the splitting with every stitch whether I used my Takumi Velvet dpns (double pointed needles) or my Addi Turbos. Facing reality and acknowledging I won't win the Tofutsies prize, I took it off the needles without even trying to frog it. It's lying in a heap next to me. So, I took out the pastel limited edition Lorna's Laces from Jimmy Beans in Spring Forward and cast on. I knit the cuff-a very PITA knit one purl one rib for 12 rounds. When I started the pattern which is very pretty, I was doing my increases wrong and they left little eyelet holes every pattern repeat. I knew deep in my knitter's soul I was dead wrong after the second row of the pattern but I persevered another 2 rows for a full pattern repeat. In frustration, I emailed my friend Rositta who kindly set me straight. Thanks Rosibaby (her nom de guerre.) When I gently withdrew my needles to "frog" every so delicately to the end of my cuff, it all went to hell in a hand basket. And I cast on again.

I love sock architecture. It amazes me what I can do with toothpicks and string. Behold the cuff, leg, heel, heel turn and gusset of the pattern "Detonator." Bring on the foot! I like the appearance of this sock just fine but I think the instep is rather tedious. It's not as bad as some patterns but I'm finding it difficult to remember where I am and have taken to using my stitch markers to remind me if I am on row 2 or 4 of the pattern. As luck would have it, the sole and rows 1 and 3 are in stockinette which in the round is knit every stitch. I am done with the gusset decreases and it's straight to the toes for a shoe size of 9. Not as big as my freighters. Lucky me. I wish it was the second sock. If so, I'd have reason to crow.

Game 2 of Round 3 is a nail biter. One penalty after another. Tomas Holmstrom must have balls of steel. This man takes a hockey stick to the groin all through the game. He perches his gonads directly in front of the goalie and doesn't move. Even with a stick slammed up there. It must be obvious that I've stopped knitting for a bit-actually my fingers were cramping-to update and watch the game. Incidently, we won. Great game Boys in Red.

Kerfuffle

Who knew?  I always thought this favorite word of mine was Yiddish.  I'm not Jewish so I didn't really know.  I like it way better than clusterf$*k and even SNAFU.  They all mean the same sort of thing though.  I pronounce it kafuffle.  No r. No e for that matter either.  I use this word routinely at work.  

KERFUFFLE noun, mid-19th century, colloquial, Originally Scottish, also ‘kafuffle,’ ‘kafuffle’ [Perhaps from ‘kafuffle’ verb, but cf. Irish ‘coir thuathail,’ confusion, disorder.] Fuss, commotion, disorder, agitation.

The start of Sock Wars was a HUGE kafuffle and sort of a let down after all these weeks of talking it up.  There was some sort of mess with the mail merge and MANY did not get emailed the dossiers of their victims, including moi.  I am not letting it get me down though.  After about five hours, the pattern was posted on the website and I began to knit.

After a false start or two and a wee bit of frogging (rip-it, rip-it) and some tinking (knitting backwards) I began.  I knit til midnight last night and couldn't make another stitch.  I used circs, I used dpns, I used patience.  I checked my emails and the Sock Wars Forum 800,00 times and began to despair that perhaps, I'd been cut.  It isn't so but I didn't find that out until 1 PM today.   Although I've been given a copy of the final list and I can find who is knitting for me and who I'm supposed to kill, I can't find my victim on the warrior list.  I'm awaiting the email I was supposed to get at 12 PM GMT yesterday.

So, I'm on the gusset of sock 1 and considering casting on the cuff for sock two.  There was almost a disaster with the DAMN DOG and my yarn but I intervened before the yarn I settled on was shredded.  Doesn't mean I saved it from the slobber though.  There is plenty of dog slobber on the yet to be wound skein.  

Not winding it is part of my plan.  I am not going to help the person who kills me before my time.  If I finish this sock tonight, I'll wind it.  I'm worried because I'm behind and have to work tomorrow and Monday.  Think my patients would mind if I knit instead of nursing them to their normal state of chronically critically ill?  They may get pissy about that.  Literally.

So, battle on.  I'm off to shower since I've been up battling since the butt crack of dawn and my kids are taking me out for dinner for Mother's Day.  I hope yarn is involved.  I'll post pics of my progress as soon as the camera battery charges.  

In the mean time, listen to this song; I can't get this song out of my mind so I may as well not be alone when humming this.   I love Canadians and I have a special spot in my musical heart for Neil.  I find his voice mesmerizing.  Maybe being mesmerized during battle isn't such a good thing.  I hope my assassin listens too.

Watch out Cindy AKA Pixiedust.  I'm all over your socks and I plan a brutal death for you.  If not me, then the person who kills me.  I am also relieved you are a girl since I settled on my beloved Lorna's Laces in the colors of Easter.  Hope you like pastels.  Just don't bleed on them when they arrive.

Killing Time

Here is the hook for boys who haven't a clue why an ICU nurse would need one of these. We do not play contact sports per se on our job; we use this little toy to secure the last toy pictured here. Read on.


Just killing time waiting for the start of Sock Wars III which is late. It's supposed to start at 12 noon GMT which by my calculations was an hour ago but may be at 9am if one takes DST into account. We'll see. I thought I would show you some of the equipment we nurses (3 of us for 1 patient) had the delight to play with. Who says chicks who nurse don't have cool toys?

Seems the patient can't protect his airway. We'd better tube him. Quick, get the vent.

"I have a bad feeling here. Could you just park the crash cart outside the door to the room please?"

"Could someone run to blood bank for me?" Only a dozen times.

"Oh, I'm so relieved endoscopy is coming to us instead of us going to them. Their room is so teeny compared to ours."

"Quick, get me the largest bore IV you have!" "OK Doctor Savetheday, here it is. You did want the Cordis, right?"

Let's get this Blakemore tube in. Hurry. BP is FALLING, HR is skyrocketing. Looks like hemorrhagic shock to me. Nurse Rudee says a little prayer for her colleague's patient at this point. "Jesus, I've never seen so much blood, please make it stop."

Ramping up...you may not see me

Just in case y'all were thinking I'm a bit crazy about knitting socks, this came along. It doesn't prove I'm not crazy-just that I'm not alone with this insane desire to knit warm foot coverings:

Reuters:

Die-hard knitters prepare for sock battle

By Claire Sibonney
Thu May 1, 12:10 PM ET

There may be nothing scary about socks, but a cut-throat competition involving hundreds of furiously fast knitters with pointy needles is enough to send even accomplished enthusiasts' pulse racing.

Sock Wars III, billed by its organizers as the "bloodiest death-by-knitting tournament," enlists players from around the world to take part in a game that shows knitting is no longer just a grandmothers' hobby.

It was started by Julie Gardner, a 31-year-old freelance TV and film production manager in Belfast, Northern Ireland, a couple years ago after she heard about StreetWars, a game that uses mock weapons and is popular on college campuses.

Gardner was excited about pitting knitters against each other with a sudden-death spin.

"I love the fact that we have had competitors ranging from teenagers knitting their first socks through to silver surfer great grannies in their 70s," she said.

Around 1,000 women -- and some men -- have already signed up for this year's tournament, which starts May 9. The deadline for applications on www.sock-wars.com is May 3.

Each contestant must knit a pair of socks from the same original pattern for another player in a specific size and mail it to another contestant, or target.

When the targets receive the finished socks from their assassins they are "killed," or out of the game, and must mail their assassins their unfinished socks. The assassins must then finish that pair of socks and mail them to their new targets. The last sock-knitter left wins.

Knitters from the United States, Canada, Britain, the Netherland and Australia took part in last year's contest.

"I think it's brilliant," said Amy Singer, the author of knitting books and editor of Knitty.com, an online knitting magazine based in Toronto.

Knitting's feisty new image has been boosted over the last decade by books such as "Stitch and Bitch," "Chicks with Sticks" and "The Friday Night Knitting Club" -- a bestselling novel that has been turned into a new film starring real-life knitter Julia Roberts -- as well as the Internet, knitting clubs and cafes.

Fans insist it's not just a fad.

"Knitting is not the new yoga, knitting is the new knitting," said Singer.

The prize for the past two tournaments has been a pair of socks. This year, every competitor is promised a pair of socks, while the grand prize winner will also receive a $500 supply of yarn.

Sock Love

Meet the foot of my friend Tina. Behold her first sock so fetchingly modeled. She is so proud, but I don't know who is prouder, her or me. She is my 2nd student ever and I am thrilled with her progress. She already knew how to knit but found knitting in the round daunting. She started this sock on the 7th. We met on the 9th where I showed her how to knit the heel flap and pick up the gusset stitches. She finished the first sock on the 11th and is now half way through the 2nd sock. The yarn, which is just about my favorite sock yarn (Jitterbug in the color Fire) was my gift to Tina to tempt her into sock knitting. Now I have to convince her she is indeed ready for Sock Wars. She may want to sign up quick-it closes to enrollment May 2nd. I hope for my sake I get her to assassinate with her size 7 foot instead of my friend Rositta's.

To repay me for my kindness and teaching patience, she told me about the yarn sale at my favorite yarn store. I had conveniently forgotten all about the sale. Nothing sings to a knitter's soul like the words yarn and sale in the same sentence. Nothing is more dangerous than taking another yarn loving person to a sale like this. I think a gang like mentality sets in and before you know it, you've spent a small fortune on all kinds of stuff you know you surely don't need.

While there, we found out that the owner also honors knitting nurses with a 15% discount during nurses week (the owner is a nurse-outstanding!). We're sure to go back for more fiber indulgence. While sales staff wound Tina's new found sock yarn into pretty little cakes of yarn in another part of the store, we looked in wonder and awe at the spinning wheels. This naturally led to a discussion about learning to spin yarn. It's on my bucket list. Apparently, it's on Tina's too.

Look at this booty.... Let's see, there is Stephanie Pearl McPhee's new book Things I Learned from Knitting, Melissa Morgan-Oakes 2-at-a-time Socks (it will be dog eared by May 9th), some new stuff from Brown Sheep (Wildfoote in Rock 'n Roll), Dream In Color's Smooshy (in Chinatown Apple), and three skeins of Mountain Colors Bearfoot (in Rosehip, Ruby River and Spruce). The Spruce is earmarked for this pair of socks. There seems to be a LOT of red yarn in there. I don't really know why but it sure is purdy.

All in all, it was a wonderful way to spend a rainy Saturday and my children's inheritance.

You've Got Mail

This is what I like to see in my email:

Subject: Jimmy Beans Wool has shipped you a package!

Thank you for your order! Your backordered Tofutsies is being shipped today & should be in your mailbox shortly.

Thanks again and we hope to hear from you soon,
Jimmy

That is strategy at work for SOCK WARS. Swatching will start as soon as I am in receipt. Here is my swatching strategy (you do swatch, don't you?):

Я брошу на пряже на игле размера одного и свяжу 4 дюйма. После того как рядок purl на стороне вязать, я переключит к игле размера 2 и свяжет 4 дюйма. После другого рядка purl на правой стороне, я переключу к игле размера 3 и повтору 4 дюйма. Then I will wash and dry my swatch and measure my guage.

How do you plan to check your guage? If you'd like to know how I'd do it, better find a Russian friend.   I'd have used French but it's much too common.  You're far less likely to know someone who can read Russian.  I'll never utter my strategy in English.  Further dispatches shall be knitted into my work.  You'll have to read knitting to be able to understand.

M. Defarge

*****Update***** That is Tofutsies in 3 Feet Short (something a warrior doesn't want to be).The color didn't look like this online, it's better.  Pinks, yellows and orange.  They'll look muy bueno with my summer Keens.(orange)  It came in the mail today around 3 so I cast on, knit the cuff.  I've moved on to the leg.  What swatch?  Pffft.  Who needs to swatch?  I wasn't sure about this stuff.  It seemed to fray a bit on the cast on, but after 1 row, it's a dream to knit.  Go git yerself some.  So that ya don't start thinking Jimmy Beans is magical, it's the other skein they sent out today.  This was the first sent out Friday...

I've Enlisted

I realize I'm a little old, but I've gone and enlisted in the war. I will be joining hundreds of my sisters and brothers in an effort to kill, or be killed. What weapon will I choose? Knitting needles of course. I've gone and joined Sock Wars III. Fool. This is a wildly popular knitting gone mad sort of contest. I'll be making my favorite thing of all, and doing it as fast as I can in an effort not to be killed off too quickly. If I am, I'll only have a pair of socks to show for my war effort. If I win, there'll be a huge yarn payoff. Cha-ching. Note to self: start building that new wing for yarn storage solution.

On May 8th, I'll be emailed a dossier on who my enemy is and a sock pattern to complete. I'll knit those as fast as humanly possible for a girl who can't flush her double points and mail them to my enemy. If my socks get to the enemy first, he or she is DEAD (I'm praying for only she enemies who generally tend to have smaller feet). My enemy must then send me the socks they've been working on (hopefully quickly) to assasinate their enemy who has now become my enemy. Those socks in progress will become my secret weapon. Are you following me? It seems hopeless, but I'm willing to give it a shot and have begun to stockpile sick days from work just in case. I do have natural secret weapons like my size 10 freighter feet (pity the poor soul who gets my dossier) and an ability to knit in the dark-just so long as the pattern is simple.



I am planning my own going away party as I plan to totally ignore everyone I know during the war. I will try to stockpile blogposts too but this is more difficult. Perhaps I can teach myself to knit with my hands and manipulate the keyboard with my toes. In the meantime, I'm off to a Navy Seal training program where I'll study The Art of War and Socks Soar on Two Circulars.



If you'd like a chance at killing me, you can read all about it here. There is a $2.00 registration fee. And no honey, you can't start making plans for the life insurance. Oh, and if you think of remarrying once I'm killed off, I'll haunt you.



"The art of war is simple enough. Find out where your enemy is. Get at him as soon as you can. Strike him as hard as you can, and keep moving on." Ulysses S. Grant