Pixies and Pixels

Today is the day where we will find out who will be gloating and who amongst us will be crying in our oatmeal as we watch the morning news tomorrow. To take your mind off your candidate of choice, I'd like to take you for a stroll through the insane asylum. I do this as a public service so you know that no matter how bad things are, they can always be worse.

WANTED:

Stinkerbell McBookeater 

for the crime of almost starting WWIII

Years and years ago, there was a beautiful book out that had large pictures of Disney characters. Within each picture, were hundreds of smaller photographs or pictures (pixels) of the movie the character starred in. For instance, you could look at a large picture of Tinkerbell and see within the picture, scenes from the movie Peter Pan. Hundreds of them. This was one of Rachel's favorite books. She would stare at each photo for hours, devouring the hidden scenes within them. When I found this book at an area Borders Express, I bought every single copy. A half dozen of them. Then I scoured the area's Borders stores for more. Her caregivers did the same thing.  All told, I think we found about ten copies which we hid and then brought out on special occasions.

Don't be mislead by that innocent photo at the top, the truth is, our little pixie Rachel isn't very nice to books. When I say she would devour the books, I mean that figuratively and literally. She will chew on a book and its binding until there is no evidence it ever existed. Medically, this eating disorder is called pica. She has it. When she was just a wee thing, she'd put anything inedible in her mouth and this isn't uncommon with youngsters. It's why we childproof a house. I have fond memories of calling her name one afternoon when she was out in our garden. When she turned around to look at me, her mouth was stuffed with marigolds. I'd give my kingdom for a photograph of that memory.

The evidence that perhaps, Stinkerbell hates Peter Pan

She will eat the last scrap of evidence that food ever existed too. The inedible portions, like a corn cob, the pit of a peach or the peel of a banana. I can't tell you how many times I had to call poison control in respect to consumption of bizarre things like ashes in the fireplace.  Once, she ate a poisonous plant on school grounds (don't ask) and had to go by ambulance to an ER where she stubbornly refused to drink the activated charcoal.  For 4 hours, she was kept on a heart monitor to be sure she hadn't suffered cardiac toxicity from her brush with the plant.  Now if she would eat ashes, don't you think she'd drink the charcoal?  Nope.  She'd have nothing to do with it!  This girl has kept me hopping for a solid 18 years. Our home was childproofed in the most bizarre ways.   We went through duct tape like nobody's business.  We had a rope to tie the fireplace doors together and locks on every room in the house. We'd never entertain the idea of a fire unless she was already sound asleep and we had no plans to turn our backs on the fire.

Rachel also likes the glittery things in life. In that, she's no different than most girls. However, one can only take the gold bracelet back to the jeweler so many times before the jeweler becomes suspicious about how the links to the bracelet just fell apart. I think the tooth impressions set in the gold tipped him off. I know that my husband's original wedding ring ultimately got flushed. There is no other explanation for why it went missing. I draw the line at sifting through poop when it comes to finding missing items.

Sadly, that Disney pixel book is no longer in print. It was her favorite-even more than all the Dr. Seuss books. Those Seuss books almost started World War III. We were at my mother in law's house when disaster struck and Rachel had herself a Seuss feast. Those books didn't belong to her though; they were my sister in laws and she about died when she saw what her niece had done to her childhood memories. I got an earful the day this tragedy came to light. I was so used to our daughter's disorder that I sort of took the whole episode in stride and tried to find humor in it.  Like, maybe she was hungry and those green eggs and ham were irresistible.  I had no idea how this event would upset someone not used to the daily consumption of books and I was taken aback by how stricken my sister in law was.  Years later, having lost two beautiful gold bracelets to this disorder, I sort of get why she was so upset.  To say the least, it can be stressful living with a child like Stinkerbell but luckily, Dr. Seuss books can be replaced. So can wedding rings and bracelets. I miss that out of print Disney pixel book though and wish I could find some to replace those that have given their all to bring a girl pleasure.