Saturday, April 17, 2010

Working Black Cloud

Leo watching Cesar train an overly aggressive Lab. The growling intrigued Leo.

It's been a rough week with work and I'm grateful it's finally Saturday. I've pronounced a lot of deaths this week, and that's really unusual for me. In fact, I've pronounced one death every single night and tonight, two. Doing this is so rare for me, that I often go a month at a time without having to do this task. I never really thought this would take such an emotional toll, but that was before I got clobbered with the likes of a week like this. I feel drained.

Enough already! I'm crying uncle to the cosmos.

To help alleviate the stress of the week, I knit one neck warmer and then went up to the yarn store this morning to buy buttons. I should have gone to the fabric store since while I find fabric pretty to look at, I'm not tempted to buy. Of course there was a sale which was the underlying reason I went shopping for buttons in the first place.

The idea for what I plan to make started with the neck warmer made of my creamsicle hand spun, and grew from there. I chose only yarns in that color family, but these are yarns outside of what I usually play with. The project, a feather and fan shawl of many different yarns should be interesting and with luck, it will take my mind off my work.

Now I need only find all that yarn I spun last year. I know half of it is waiting to be frogged, but I have no clue where the rest of it's hiding. Maybe I should get to unpacking that yarn room.

Here's hoping the yarn turns up soon, and that death takes a little holiday for me next week.


15 comments:

Miss 376 said...

Hardly surprising it has taken it's toll. Organising your yarn room sounds lovely.

clairedulalune said...

Oh Rudee, that is one tough week you have had. You would need the heart of a lion to do your job, you are amazing. The yarn room sounds like something to take things off your mind a bit. Here is to better days for you Rudee!

Gail said...

It takes someone very special to do this job. I know I could not. Thank you for being there for those in need.

Looks like the pup has settled in and made himself at home. I can just sense his personality in this shot.

distracted by shiny objects said...

It's been bad down here, too. Four days of work and a death each day. It seeps inside of you. Lucky for me, HoneyHaired's going to prom tonight so dress, shoe and hair decisions have been big topics of thought and conversation. Kids always have a way to keep you tethered to the here-and-now and the importance of the daily. This job will be much harder when both girls are out of the house.

Ruth said...

Some deaths at work are so hard to cope with - you need yarn and nice things.
I have had many patients die some I will never ever forget there is a special place in my heart for them for many different reasons, their youth, dignity or one of the many ways they touched me before death. Dying is so personal and I have been honoured to be part of many peoples last days.
However it is very draining and i hope you can find some time to regroup and gather yourself.

Brenda said...

Snuggle up with the beautiful quilt you just won. It was made with love as are all the gifts you have made for others. I hope your weekend is relaxing Rudee.

Finding Pam said...

I have to agree with everyone's thoughts on death, but I like Ruth's take on it. It is indeed an honor to be with someone during their last moments of life.

I pray that you can heal from all of the death that you have seen this week.

Just know that they are in a better place and in no pain.
Great picture of Leo. He looks like he has been with you forever.

Stephanie V said...

Look at Leo! He's definitely at home there on that couch. And his own TV tuned to his favorite show.

Have fun finding all your yarn...the shawl sounds intriguing. Can't wait to see it cast on.

My mother used to have a saying: "It never rains, but it pours." Sounds like you're having one of those times. Rest and knit.

Rose said...

Leo looks so cute sitting there attentively watching the tv. He seems well behaved!! So glad you have him (and vice versa I'm sure). Thanks for the offer of a swap but don't feel obligated, as I'm sure I'd end up with the better deal!! Swap mailing addresses in an email?

Middle Aged Woman said...

It's good that this is the time that Leo came into your life. A little more love to carry you through.

Sandy said...

That is so odd about all the deaths, are they with mostly older people, or are they cancer or..Just being curious why the upswing lately. I like that room, very cozy looking.

Queenmothermamaw said...

Death is the name of the game eventually with Hospice, but you have had more than your share it seems. Leo looks so cute and right at home. Like the description of your new project. Can't wait to see the colors.
QMM

CT said...

My heart hurts just to think what yours has gone through these days. I think going to the yarn shop for buttons was the right thing to do...

By the way, I love the idea of a Yarn Room! it sounds so pleasant and soft and... yarny!!!

By all means, loose yourself in Yarnia!!!

Jane said...

Thought of you this week. My Uncle was just given 6mths to live. He has stomach cancer. I hope he's blessed enough to have someone as wonderful and caring as you are to share his last days.
Leo has definitely come into your life at the right time. His antics are sure to give you some light relief!

Lisa L said...

i am having an amazingly challenging hospice weekend on call. there are to dear souls, getting ready to cross the river styx as i type. its 5.38pm here and i think it will be a long night.