Fightin' Words

The saga of the dining room furniture continues. I thought I'd share with you some of Sunday's missives that began with a voicemail from the antiques dealer, here to forth referred to as The Misogynist:

"The buyer couldn't make it yesterday or today, so if you still want to do this, we're on for next Saturday."

Me to husband. Hmm. I don't even want to speak to this discourteous man. I think I'll email him. So I do:

Dear Mr. Antiques Dealer,

I gave up many hours of my week to prepare the dining room set for the sale you were listing. After waiting all morning yesterday for both you to arrive at 11:15 AM as scheduled, and the seller, who was to arrive at noon, I had to call you after noon to find out that the sellers were not in contact with you. My time off work is valuable to me and I hate to waste it.

Subsequently, I choose now to remove my dining room suite from your listing. Please notify the buyer, who you have told me has asked to buy this, but has not actually submitted the funds, that it is no longer available for sale.

Sincerely,

Nurse Rudee

And I go about my afternoon knitting...la-la-la-la-la...

Later that day:

Dear Nurse Rudee:

I am sorry for your being upset at me but this is not within my control as the buyer is. I called late Saturday night and at 9:00AM to the buyer. I did my duty to pin the eBay auction buyer down to find out when she would arrive. Believe it or not my schedule is busier than yours with the preparation of 7 major estate sales and working within a home in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. I currently am working about 70 hours a week and was willing to drop everything I was working on to drive to Berkley.

The eBay buyer says she will obtain a truck to pick up dinning room suite this coming Saturday.

In all fairness I would not think that anyone would feel the eBay Buyer should have picked the furniture up on Saturday as it did not stop raining until

3:30PM and heavy snowfall Saturday evening and black ice all over the metro area up until 12:00Noon.

You did sign a consignment agreement form for me to market it on eBay and legally the eBay buyer purchased the set accordingly. If you refuse to sell from an eBay buyer than she can give me a negative rating which can impact my business opportunity to continue selling on eBay.

I could require for them to pay for it now on eBay either through paypal or on charge card at the gallery. Believe it or not I am only earning a 15% commission once eBay, Paypal and or charged on credit card. My time it is not worth all this aggravation also.

Like yourself this dinning suite sale is not worth my time also but I have this strong work ethics to serve people and make this world a better place in which we live.

I would recommend to you I would demand that she pay for it now or before the end of the week by Wednesday and or the burden is on her to pick it up according to your schedule.

Respectfully,

The Misogynist

I have highlighted the points that I took offense to. So now we have being stood up without a call, my furniture being called unworthy, and a big fat name dropping moron to top it all off. He had no problem taking my money for the appraisal, but now the $600 he stands to earn is apparently not worth his time. Obviously. He was so busy he couldn't even stop to use spell check and now I have a dinning room suite to sell. Is that a room with loud noise? Ugh.

So I knit. Tightly. And I stewed for a bit and then shot off my reply:

Dear Mr. Misgogynist,

Please, I don't wish for an argument here. I've decided not to sell my items after all.

Frankly, I am offended that you would think my time is not valuable and would leave me hanging without notification as though it's not worth another thought. How unprofessional! Yes, you have many estate sales pending, but we both work full time, too, and our off time is precious. I missed one morning commitment to accommodate you already, and now you would like me to do the same for next week. I spent many hours this week preparing my furniture for pick up on Saturday, and you did not have the courtesy to let me know that nothing would happen.

Please submit to me the proof that this buyer has purchased these items that you deem worthless and not worthy of your time to sell immediately and I will reconsider. If you can prove to me that money has exchanged hands, then I will of course sell the items. At the time of pick up, I will insist on being paid in cash.

Sincerely,

Overly Patient Nurse Rudee

To which he inelegantly replied...

Dear Nurse Rudee:

I did not say your time was valuable you stated that. I would recommend re-reading the first email that I sent you that should clarify your statements that are not factual and without merit.

You stated that your items are worthless and not myself.

Here's my proof!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here he includes a picture of his ebay page that states the item has sold, but really? He's not in receipt of any funds, so it's incomplete.

Still, I'm not unreasonable. I just want an apology from him for wasting my time. I will sell it if I must now, but I want to hear him say, I'm sorry, so I point out one of his insults:

Dear Mr. Obstinent Misogynist,

So in your opinion, I should disregard your wording when you plainly state this?

"Like yourself this dinning suite sale is not worth my time also but I have this strong work ethics to serve people and make this world a better place in which we live."

This is a completely frustrating situation and instead of acknowledging that you are wrong to treat any costumer so poorly, you continue to insult. Please, this matter is over. Your voice mail of this morning indicated that the decision is mine whether to continue or not. I've chosen not to do so. I thank you for your time and effort in this matter.

Sincerely,

OPNR

To which he responds, now clearly threatening and nasty:

Dear Nurse Rudee:

Unfortunately this matter is not over. Whether you decide to sell your dinning suite or not you violated a contract agreement. I sold this item at your request on eBay which is a legal and a binding auction purchase agreement.

If you do not sell it you still owe me a 30% commission on a sale of $ 1950.00 which equals approximately $ 585.00 plus court costs and damages for negative ratings for future sales which could amount into thousands of dollars of lost sales. This does not preclude a counter suite by the purchaser.

If you do not honor this agreement my legal counsel advises me that the District Court, Honorable Judge XXXxxxc will render his opinion based for you based on the strong legal merits of this case.

I will allow you an opportunity to re-think through your final decision until Wednesday evening at approximately 7:00PM. If I have not heard from you by then I will file legal action against you.

I trust you will have a more pleasant evening.

Respectfully,

I.M.A. Asshole Misogynist

Antiques Auctioneer, Fine Arts Appraisals

So my husband called him, because by this time, I was apoplectic with indignant rage and screaming at my laptop. My husband simply couldn't take it any more.

This was when the moron on the other end of the phone told my husband I must have been having a bad day. My hero did not let my hormones or implied madness take the blame though. He said to the dolt, "my wife is not having a bad day and frankly, I'm offended you'd say anything like that."

So the buyer gets one more chance to take my dinnnnnnnning room set. If they aren't here at 10AM sharp next Saturday, we're done. By then, my 180 day contract with that unfortunate proprietor with the big fat mouth will be over.

That's the end of my saga for the day. I'm off to go put this creepy guy in the freezer.