"When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears."
Several years ago, in the middle of the summer, I took care of the most miserable patient in the world. He was a physical and emotional mess. All day long, I was poking him for all kinds of labs. There were multiple sets of blood cultures and one or two bleeding times. Of course, nothing could be drawn all at the same time to ease his discomfort. Every time this patient saw me coming into his room, he'd bitch and grumble. Who could blame him? I never brought him anything nice.
When I went in to draw his last set of labs, this great big hulk of a man looked at me with such despair on his face. I stopped what I was doing, held his hand and gave him a hug. I told him that as awful as this day was, it was just one day out of many and his life would get better. He told me he thought he was going to die. We spent quite a bit of time talking about nothing...and everything. When he'd said what he had to, he dug deep and let me draw his blood.
I thought about that man tonight as I drove all over God's white acre in a blizzard. Who in their right mind drives in such a mess, unless of course they have no choice? The last time I saw this patient, he'd come up to the hospital to bring me a card to thank me for getting him through that long summer day and to show me that I was right. His life did get better. He made that trip in a snowstorm that throughout the day, had dumped about 10 inches of snow on the ground.
Sometimes, thoughts and memories that come upon us by surprise have purpose. I know that this one did. It made me feel better about what I do, and why I choose to do it.
It's the first time in a couple of weeks, that I've felt really good about being a nurse.