I'm curious if anyone out there thinks they may be psychic. Or if not psychic, at least sensitive. I'm talking about the times you think of someone you haven't thought of in a long time and the next thing you know, they're knocking on your door, calling you or writing you. This happens to me a lot and quite frankly, spooks me when it does.
Six years ago, my dad died. He'd not been feeling well for a week or so then finally got so bad that they went to the hospital. Living in a small town, there wasn't a choice of hospitals. It's also a very small hospital with around 100 beds. I'd left work when I got the call and he was still in the ER. I ran out to get a bite to eat and went back to make sure he was in a room and he had what he needed. The staff had put my dad in a room with another patient who was in 4 point leather restraints and had a 1:1 sitter. The nursing alarms were ringing in my head; this would never do. I made a little noise and they moved my dad to Room 130 Bed B. He died that night. I remember calling to check on him later too (when I had a premonition) and being scolded with "did you really want me to wake him? Can't you wait until morning?" I wish now that I'd insisted, but that is an entirely different story.
Almost exactly 4 years later, my mom was admitted to the same small hospital. When I got to the hospital, my mom was actively dying and she was in the same exact room and bed number as my dad had been: 130B. She had told me some weeks earlier that she didn't want anything heroic done. Just comfort care. We requested hospice for her and began a bedside vigil. Hospice staff had told us they'd move her to a hospice room as soon as it became available. I knew they wouldn't be able to do that. She was meant to die right there, in the same space my father had. She passed around 7 hours after we signed her onto hospice. I know it sounds weird. I know the hospital is small, but what are the odds that this is the spot she'd die?
These memories came up yesterday because I did a hospice visit at that hospital yesterday. Thankfully, the patient was in a different bed. I felt uncomfortable there and found it hard to be in the moment with my new patient's family when all I could think of was my own.