Saturday, November 12, 2011

Nurse Crankybritches


Blame it on the full moon, or even the alignment of all of those ones in the date yesterday, but I am one ill tempered woman this week and I think I know the cause: Inability to knit. Whenever I'm annoyed or overwhelmed, I sit down for a spell and knit my troubles away. This small act helps me cope with whatever the cosmos has sent my way. I've had this addiction with this particular anti-anxiety coping mechanism for about 8 years now. Knitting is what I do to get by. With bilateral hand injuries, I've been thwarted in the coping department and minor annoyances have become thorns in my side.

Today I was abruptly awakened at the butt crack of dawn by two babies crying. They sounded like they were being beaten and there was no way I was going to let that happen. Dressed only in my pajamas (thank God I don't sleep in the buff), I ran out the front door--barefoot in freezing weather--to track down the culprits beating their helpless offspring. I was in the mood to garrote someone with a sturdy cabled circular knitting needle or more likely, throw some well aimed verbal barbs at those vicious parents. Never mind that this scenario made no sense at all to my sleep deprived brain since none of my neighbors have babies. I was convinced that this was indeed what I was hearing. Now outside and frozen solid, reality was setting in. I wasn't hearing babies, I was hearing caterwauling. Really...my neighbor's cats were under another neighbor's truck (right next to my bedroom window) and they were crying...like babies being beaten. What caring parent can ignore a baby's cries for help? Now wide awake early on a Saturday, it would have been perfect for me to grab my wheel and go to spinning circle, except I can't pick up and carry two cups of coffee in my hands, let alone a wheel and project bag. Ugh.

After the feline incident, I turned on my phone to see how little the midnight shift nurse worked. Talk about a thorn in the side--this woman never gets a call and because she works nights, she earns more than the rest of us and primarily sleeps through her shift. Around midnight last night, I sent report on my busy, busy shift, including information on an emergency hospice admission I did late last night. This morning, she reports she got a call regarding the same patient and thought he needed an emergency hospice admission. If she'd bothered to read my report, she'd have known it was already done and the facility was likely calling for some other problem. I texted her as much and she texted this back: "I'm never sure what's going on." WHAT??? Now I know for certain that not only does she rarely get patient calls, she doesn't read reports she does get about patients the rest of us handle. If I could, I'd reach through that phone and stab her in her apathetic eye with one of my idle knitting needles.

See? I can't cope. I.Must.Knit.

Even though my hands hurt, I've been searching for a way to knit without pain. I've discovered purling continental style hurts my left thumb the least and my right hand not at all, so I cast on Wurm. So far I'm still knitting the brim of the hat and though it's taken me 2 days to knit a mere 26 rows, I'm nearly done with that and soon I'll be purling several rows between the knitted rows and that, I'm hoping, should bring some solace, or at least raise my bullshit tolerance up to a more manageable level.

It's either that or I'll have to open a Paypal account so together we can start raising my bond money. Y'all would have my back, wouldn't you?




16 comments:

Jadekitty said...

Ah, I sure hope things resolve themselves quickly!

Brenda said...

Knitting and sewing and reading are my three lifelines. Without them I would be a complete mess. I hope things gets better very soon for you...but you are not alone in your grouchiness. Everyone I have talked to lately is feeling all pent up with frustration. Including me.

Stephanie V said...

Absolutely, Ive got your back. I've been there. I find that having to knit slowly is even better at stress-relief than whizzing around and around on a sock.

When cats make that yowling noise, they do sound like babies. Even when you're wide awake and know what is making the noise. It's a horrible sound - no mother can ignore it.

Alice said...

2 seagulls fighting over a sandwich in the middle of the street at 5 am . . . sounds like a child being killed.

cute hat.

NCmountainwoman said...

You bet we got your back, blogger buddy!

Funny, I can't knit when I am upset. I think I enjoy knitting so much I don't want to do it when I'm in a bad mood. It spoils the knitting instead of helping me calm down.

SkippyMom said...

In a second. I have a Tadpole bail fund - I figure one of us in going to end in the pokey sooner or later - and if it doesn't happen we can always throw a hell of a party. :)

Go pet Leo - you'll feel better. Guarantee. :)

Finding Pam said...

I didn't know knitting relieved so much stress. Looks like I need to learn how to knit.

I am having trouble with my hormones right now. My road rage is back in triplets and I am so hot and grumpy. Unfortunately, I can't go on hormones because of my diabetes (so says my gyn doc). She tested my thyroid to see if that's the problem.

I will be happy to spot you some bail money if you will return the favor?

Mimi said...

Oh dear Rudee, you're in a bad place!
I think I'd have killed those cats for getting me all het up and outa bed!
And as for that nurse...no, don't get me started.
(warm, sympathetic thoughts), hope you're able to knit in earnest soon

Mimi said...

p.s. loved the title of this post, you've got a wonderful sense of humour in spite of everything

Denise said...

I hope your wrists heal quickly so you can get back to knitting.

Not reading reports of patient records is a pet peeve of mine. I've been tempted to get all stabby on some medical personnel this past year.

I totally got your back. Will work a couple extra shifts if I have to, to raise your bail money.

Empress Bee (of the high sea) said...

oh yeah, i've got your back. go get 'em!

smiles, bee
xoxoxoxoox

Ruth said...

Hope you get better soon and can knit - knitting saves lives - the lives of those we wish we could kill. So when mad we just knit faster.
I'll be in on the bond money.Either that or we will both be the same cell.Friends post bail good friends help you hide the body.,

Knitty said...

I would definitely have your back! Don't ruin any good needles in your attack on the numskull. I have some old aluminum ones you can use. I was going to have hubby bend them into bracelets (I bought one from Etsy) but this would be a worthy cause. ;-)

Rositta said...

I knew right away that it was cats. We have strays in Greece that cry like babies and the first time I heard them I too thought that. Take care of your hands and yes, I've got your back...anytime...ciao

The Bug said...

I hope that at least you were snarky with the coworker. I was famous for saying stuff like, "oh, didn't you READ the report I gave you? It had all kinds of important information in it! Go read it now. I'll wait. Done yet?"

sapphireblue said...

I would totally chip in for bail money. I would be in the looney bin if it weren't for my knitting.