Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Breaking News

The Knitting Nurse finally conquers Row 116 in a savage battle of wits. What a fight it was and since most of you missed it, your own Ms. Knitting Perfection from The Guild has snagged an interview with the winner.

KP: So, Knitting Nurse, tell us, how does it feel to have finally completed the 317 stitches in Row 116?

KK: It feels great. Finally, I can relax a little with this shawl and complete the remaining 112 rows with peace of mind. I may even come to enjoy knitting this project.

KP: There is a rumor circulating from the Row 116 camp that cheating was involved. Do you care to answer this accusation?

KK: Well, I don't feel it was cheating...exactly...it was more like making a snap judgment in the ring and correcting an obviously grievous error. You see, after I completed Row 116, I thought I had the correct stitch count. Somehow though, when purling back on Row 117, I must have purled a yarn over together with its corresponding knit stitch which left me one lousy stitch short. There was no way in hell I was going to rip back 637 stitches of lace to fix one of Row 116's dirty tricks.

KP: Tell us all then, how did you fix this?

KK: Well, on Row 118, a lovely and friendly row indeed, I studied the stitches between my cable needle and the lifeline. It came to my attention that at the very first stitch marker, my centered double decrease was on the right side of the marker instead of the left. When I came to said marker, instead of knitting a yarn over, SSK as the pattern called for, I made the executive decision to do a yarn over, K1. I gained one stitch in this manner and moved the marker to the correct side of the CDD.

KP: I see. So you did cheat as Row 116 maintains.

KK: Tough. We're not going to do battle again.

KP: Rumor has it that Row 116 has an identical twin on Row 164 that may be an even tougher opponent--after all, it's 423 stitches long. How are you preparing mentally for this battle?

KK: Cart. Horse. Let's not go there yet. Suffice it to say, I have tripled the use of lifelines in preparation for that blowhard, Row 164.

KP: There you have it folks. Row 116 falls in the ninth round in what we consider a technical knock out. Though she cheated, who can really blame the Knitting Nurse? Obviously, she had as much of Row 116 as she could take and it was either cheat, or find a room at the asylum. We at The Guild wonder, has the Knitting Nurse looked ahead to the end of this pattern? Surely, with the self assurance she has demonstrated in this interview, she can't possibly realize she faces a fussy crochet cast off.

Stay tuned.

16 comments:

The Bug said...

Huzzah! Of course, being a non-knitter I have no idea what I just read, but I know it was good :)

sapphireblue said...

Way to go. I hope the rest of the project presents no further errors.

Miss 376 said...

Hooray!

Kat Mortensen said...

Ha! This was fun, Rudee. (As someone who usually makes to about row 13 and then has to have a cup of coffee and a couple of biscuits and then ends up stuffing the knitting (as the Brits say) in a bag and going to watch t.v. (empty-handed), I say, "all's fair-isle in love and war" So there!

Kat

P.S. Don't forget to keep your eye on the Blasts From the Past blog over at Wordpress now. http://blastsfrompast.wordpress.com

NCmountainwoman said...

I have a message for Ms. Knitting Perfection: there's a huge difference between "cheating" and "correcting." Corrections are always good things and boost the knitter's morale and confidence in being able to overcome a perplexing situation.

It is said that the Amish deliberately put a "correction" into every piece they do. They consider that only God can make something perfect. And who are we to argue with God?

Rositta said...

Knockout punch for Rudee, way to go...ciao

Stephanie V said...

Priceless! Doesn't every knitter make a correction now and then? I look at it the way quilters have always done: put in a purposeful error because only God can create perfection.

distracted by shiny objects said...

I do love me an executive decision every now and again...

J'Ollie Primitives said...

You have me in stitches! Sorry, irresistible puns are my downfall.

Big round of applause for "correcting" the shawl.

Jadekitty said...

High Five! I couldn't imagine even finding a error in the pattern nevermind figuring out how to fix it. Good for you.

Ruth said...

Well corrected - now enjoy!

SkippyMom said...

You are about too funny. Big smiles for a very informative and hysterical post.

Good luck! Can't wait to see the finished product.

Mausie1 said...

OH I love it..... Yea you conquered it....lol . Loved reading it.. I always enjoy your posts.. thank you.
Hugs from South Texas...Birgit

Devon said...

I read that the great Persian Rug makers always left a visible error in their rugs. It was their belief that "Perfection lies in the realm of God".

I always knit in the most respectful way possible. No perfection for me!

Enjoyed your post.

Brenda said...

Very creative post here Rudee. Loved it!

Mylyne said...

Hahaha! Your post reminds me of the Pacquiao-Margarito fight this past weekend. Kudos to winning this battle and all the best on conquering this project. :)