In order to prevent bad luck, should the amount of salt you throw over your shoulder be proportionate to the amount of salt you spill?
Case in point:
- Can't find my driver's license and credit card.
- Tear house apart looking for these two items that I don't realize are missing until I'm walking out the door for work.
- In my frenzy to find these things, I accidentally knock over the monk that cradles my overly expensive finishing salt.
- Throw two or three grains of the precious French salt over my left shoulder and decide I will drive without my license because I've wasted so much time looking for it that I'm now late.
- Pile supplies and my butt into the car and am now drenched because it's pouring rain and I couldn't find my umbrella, either.
- Put key in ignition of two year old car and realize, oh-oh, she won't start. Huh. Say out loud to no one in particular (since I am alone), "I think my hospice-mobile is as tired as me."
- Go back in the house and call Ford Roadside Service. Call husband and tell him to drive faster so I can get to work.
- Decide to rip bedroom apart while waiting and find errant missing items on my bed under the blankets...don't ask since I have no idea how they got there.
- Surmise I was not meant to be on time today because either the Universe and the salt cellar conspired against me, or less likely, I was not meant to be on the road at that moment in time and a guardian angel spared me more mayhem. The suspicious pessimist in me prefers the former explanation.
- Half way through my shift I started late, get call from triage nurse to hurry up, drive across town and spend the rest of my shift with a patient. Can't leave until relief gets there 5 hours later.
- Drive home at 3 AM slightly nauseous because the wind is steadily buffeting the car. It was said wind gusts were 45 miles per hour. Baloney...those weren't gusts, but steady winds.
- Hear the news of all the tornados on radio and realize that as bad as my night was, it was much worse for many and think less of myself for my petty, self absorbed thoughts that have plagued me all night. Lay awake--though utterly exhausted--for hours.
- Wake up early after what seems like only 3 minutes of sleep and notice the monk was laying where he fell with some of his spillage still on the table.
- Finally put two and two together...I'd brought this all on myself. I don't think I tossed enough salt.