Tell Me Lies

I'm sorry to tell you that just like a prince who has been turned into a frog, Charming House has developed a few warts. My entire family has driven past this place at different hours of the day to get a feel for things. Noise was the primary concern and we were all worried about living with something we couldn't change. I recall when I moved out of the house I lived in prior to this place, I promised myself that I'd never live near a freeway again. In a time heals all wounds sort of way, it wasn't the noise I'd forgotten about, it was the constant layer of soot. Freeways are dirty places. Thankfully, I've recalled how hard it was to keep up with the dirt generated only 2 blocks away from the freeway. This new house is separated only by a small yard, brick wall and service drive. Because I have ringing in my ears, I know that constant noise is something that becomes a background hum, but the ever-present soot would annoy the hell out of me, especially when it got into my yarn. I have to think that's as bad as moths in terms of damage.

Charming House has a second -perhaps fatal- flaw, as it's about to be surrendered to the bank. The realtor/owner has thrown in the towel. Although she says she is current on payments, she is not current on taxes and admits to having failed to pay her winter taxes. This home is still on my short list, but I have to be realistic because their asking price covers only the bank note. Since their pricy taxes weren't included in the mortgage, how long would it be before we were booted out? Taxes are around $8,000 a year. If their assets are tapped out, who would make repairs if they were needed? Who would fix the leaky ceiling/roof on the sleeping porch, or a furnace on the fritz? I'm beginning to think of Charming House as a Danger Boy, a sweet talker. I learned a long time ago that it's bad for my mental health to listen to sweet little nothings, especially when whispered by boys who had only their own interests at heart.

For a mere $4,500 a month, you too can imbibe in the lap of luxury.

Being back at square one for house hunting has turned me into a Realtor.com voyeur. It's like peeking into people's windows from a distance. Just today, I found a house that was renting for $4,500 a month and I fell in love with the special bar area they had to offer in the basement. I would have thought that for the asking price, there would have been a more substantial offering of liquor, and a bartender to serve it up. I'd have to consume everything on that tray just to make an offer. I can't afford that much per month, but I wanted to see how the privileged folks lived. You know, like the ones with this fancy bar.


All is not lost as I've found an appealing French colonial, built in 1907, and remodeled just 2 years ago. It has a spacious Dukealicious friendly back yard, complete with a deck, and hey, check out that front porch. It does not come with a bar, but I think I can duplicate the fancy one I saw without a problem. We'll see that house tomorrow, and I'm going to add one more to the list that's been on the market for awhile now. It's a high rise loft in the heart of a busy suburban town. I know it's ultramodern, but I'm willing to keep an open mind. I'm almost over you Charming House.